Walking With Fear

Check out my Story site! Stories By WalkingWithFear

Blogs I Read:

Friday's Child

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I am

||A follower|| Fearful || Worried ||
||Empty|| A Dreamer|| Compulsive ||
||A Romantic || Forgetfull || Confused||
||Open-minded|| Trustworth|| A Story teller||
||Old Fashion|| A Believer || An Artist ||
||Movie obsessed|| A bad day magnet|| accident prone||
But over all... I am... so lost.



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If you would like to contact me on AIM...
WalkingWithFear is the name

The Basics

Date: 10/30/2004
Sex :: Girl....
Height :: 5'6
Clothing :: Jeans and a T-shirt

This or that...
Nice smiles or nice eyes? :: nice eyes
Jeans or skirts? :: Jeans
Boots or sneakers? :: both
Natural or make-up? :: natural
Restaurants or fast food? :: Restaurants
Italian food or Chinese? :: Chinese
Streaked or dyed hair?:: Neither
Vampires or Gods? :: Vampires... and Greek gods
Drugs or cigarettes? :: None thanks!
Cake or pie? :: Cake

How...
Do you want to die? :: Saving someone else's life
Much time do you take to dress up? :: 5 or 10 mins depending on how up you are talking...
Sing? :: only quitely... I don't sing well.
Dance? :: Love it

Do you...
Like spicy food? :: Definately, bring on those cajun spices!
Prefer bagels over yogurt? :: BAGELS!
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend? :: No
Think babies are cute: Yeah!
Children in general? :: Most are pretty fun, some are just aggravating.. heh
Believe that everyone has a purpose in life? :: Yeah! Only that everyone doesn't use their abilities to do anything.

Are...
You a girl? :: Uh... last time i checked...yea
You a comedian? :: I like to make people laugh, but i dunno
Your friends true friends in your opinion? :: People I can trust

Describe...
Your race :: 1/3 Welsh 1/3 Irish 1/3 French
Your hair :: Dirty strawberry blonde
Your eyes :: khaki/gold color, light green outside of that and then a darker green outside of that...
Your perfect mate (physical features) :: It varies... XP

What...
Are your weaknesses? :: I have no faith in myself, I'm lazy, and I'm apathetic
Are your fears? :: Being forgotten, or have people grieving at my funeral, losing the ones I love
Does your perfect pizza consist of? :: Pinapple and Italian Sausage
Is one thing you would like to achieve? :: Get into a good college

three things
you love :: Family, Friends, Wolves
you hate :: spiders, close minded people, and judgemental people

When was ..
last car ride :: last night
last good cry :: Rally...
last library book checked out :: whoa... Jane Austen
last movie seen :: Carrie... and part of IT
last book read :: Pride and Prejudice
last cuss word you said :: fuck
last beverage drank :: water
last food consumed :: um.....
last crush ::
last phone call :: Mr. Mike
last tv show watched :: Real World
last time showered :: This afternoon.
last shoes worn :: Sandals
last cd played :: Home made... (mwhahaha)
last downloaded :: I'll be -Edwin McCain
last annoyance :: School
last disappointment :: Being let down by friends

last soda drank :: Coke 2
last thing written :: Blog entry
last key used :: arrow key
last word spoken :: Bye
last sleep :: last night...
last im :: Supersado
last weird encounter :: Partay
last time amused :: watching movies last night
last time wanting to die :: Never...
last time hugged :: last night XD
last time scolded :: Yesterday
Last time scolding :: Dunno
last time resentful :: Today
last chair sat in :: Dining Room chair
last lipstick used :: Um... brown?
last time dancing :: Mock
last poster looked at :: A Wolf for all Seasons
last webpage visited :: www.blogdrive.com

I HURT :: When someone else hurts
I LOVE :: Art
I HATE :: Hate
I FEAR :: Everything
I HOPE :: I get into a good college
I FEEL :: Stressed
I HIDE :: When I can
I MISS :: my brother
I LEARNED :: You can't hold onto the past, or the future gets away from you.
I NEED :: To stop procrastinating
I THINK :: ALL the time

moon phases

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Wednesday, August 11, 2004

First Day of School...

Hmmm... I'm officially a Sophomore today...

   It's funny how things change isn't it? They never stop changing... I never could have predicted myself at where I am now years ago. I would have never imagined the Wallaces moving away, I always thought that they would always be there. That I would always be friends with them... Strange how things work out... Why can't things ever stay the same? Ever be simple? Why do people have to move away? I guess I'll never understand...Never get it... But I guess that's just part of life. Lose the ones you love and be forced to move on, even though your mind and your heart tell you that you don't want to.

   School was interesting today... We had an annual assembly where they introduce all the staff... Same thing... every year, sometimse there are new teacher though... So. I guess that does...something... Turns out when I got put in Latin I and II last year they dropped me out of Speech so now I'm taking Speech I with the lower classmen... And Algebra II with all the upperclass men... So THAT should be interesting.

   A teacher told me an interesting thing today... >.>;;; Yeeeeah... Told me to go to hell..
That was fun... expecially since I didn't do anything... *nods* But whatever...Mia showed up at school today... I didn't get to talk to her much, but it was good to see her. Sadie says she's gonna drop by over tommorow at school and bring doughnuts... -.-;;; Which I can't eat cause I have to get in shape for swim team... :'( But... Whatever... It will be good to see her... I swear, everytime i turn around and see a blue backpack or a girl with blonde hair and blue eyes at a glance I would swear it's Sadie.. SSA isn't the same without her...What's left of the gang agrees...

-The Fearful Walker

Posted at 10:11 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Monday, August 09, 2004

Been A While...

Wow... I guess it's been a while... but I figure since school is starting up again and I got an account with www.myspace.com i'll just link this blog to it..

Today was bookday at school... -.-;;; Just the beginning of what will probably be one of the worst years of my highschool career. Not ONLY did one of my best school friends LEAVE the school to move 45 minutes away and go to a different school... But my friend that i've known since before Pre-K is moving away to Idaho... ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY! Her family is like my second family... It's gonna be different without them... And the rest of the gang kinda drifted off into a different group at the end of last year.. So it will definately being interesting.

Book day is sooo stupid though. It's just another way to cut out vacation short... >.>;;; I mean! They don't even give out BOOKS! What the Feck!? Eh, whatever... And my mother did the whole guilt trip thing and got me to sign up for Swim team... -.-;;; Another way so i can try and be thin I suspect she thinks... -.-;;;

I don't have school tommorow... but on the 11th I do... School crept up so quick... It's not even funny... I've heard from Meghan that most of the teachers I have are complete B*tches... Whoopie! So I guess we'll see how it all turns out... Good night for now... :D

-The Fearful Walker

Posted at 11:25 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Sunday, June 13, 2004

Tommorow

Yeah, not much happened today... Heh, stayed up till 4 am with my bro watching movies and chatting on the computer. Then slept until 1 pm... I hate sleeping past 10... It makes me feel like i've wasted the day... :-P But yeah tommorow I have drivers ed. Cause i was to lazy to take it earlier... lol so i have to wake up at 7! Pain in the A**! Uh, yeah and i was supposed to be taking it with my friend saddo... but stuff happened lol..

They said sign up for the 7th but it was full and the place said they changed to the 14... So we went with the 14th, and then they changed back to the 7th... >.< LOL anyway yeah this is a pretty pathetic post, but i felt bad about leaving my blog all alone... Is a pic enough to reconcile? lol

It's part of my sig on gaiaonline.com aswell.. OH! I"m having a good bye party for my friend on the 22nd... i'm not sure if i've said that before... -.-; but I'm saying it again! :-P

-As always
-The Fearful Walker

Quote of the day:

WalkingWithFear: so sup?
sado2007: im worshipping u
sado2007: *bow bow*

Posted at 11:26 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Monday, June 07, 2004

Chocolate for comfort

Hmmm... Yeah haven't written in a while. Didn't really know what to write about... I could have written bout my day, but i didn't really feel like it i guess? lol Anyway so now i'll be throwing 2 good-bye parties. A family that has been like my second family is going to be movie all the way across the country. Now, you see, I've known this family since before pre-school. And though me and my friend, (their daughter) aren't really great friends anymore like we used to be. I'm still going to miss them. I usually visit them every sunday because Mr. Bill (the dad) is my youth group leader, and i stay at their house between church and youth and then they give me a ride there. I couldn't tell you how many times they have all been there for me.

Hopefully i'll get to visit them in their new home. Oh yeah... Why are the moving there? Cause Mr. Bill is a lawyer and the church we go to can't afford to pay him full time. And he'd like to be a youth leader full time and the church where he's going to can pay him that, and they'll still be able to live in the same lifestyle they are living in now. There is no doubt i'm going to miss them, sometimes I wish i could just pack up and move up there with them. Cause I've never liked this place, and i never want to have to stay here through college.. I've always asked to go to boreding school somewhere. Who knows, maybe if i beg my mom enough she'll let me go to school up there for a year. It's a long shot, but my mom hates the schools and school system around here so much it's possible it could work. Most people around her are so... GRR... Uptight and cliquey and gossipy and the women are INSANE. No wonder i have more guy friends... -.-; Anyway... I have to go...

-As Always
-The Fearful Walker

Posted at 07:46 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Tuesday, June 01, 2004

Wolves

Well you see... Today I saw this movie called, Never Cry Wolf. And I mainly got it because I love wolves... But it ended up being pretty good. Anyway... While chatting with one of my friends online I said that's what i would write todays blog entry on... Why I love wolves so much... lol. *shrugs* give me a break I'm having i guess a BlogBlock... I can't think of what to write...

Mmmm... How to start. Well I mean... just look at a wolf, their... regal, simple, honorable, fierce, strong, hunters, protectors. Just... look at the wolves, they are so simple. I mean, if you (being a wolf) are nice to the other wolves, they'll be nice to you... If you f*** with them... then they gonna be pretty pissed. And if you stay in you dont fight the alphas, then it's all good! It's an excellent way to co-exist... well in my book it is.

The way they stand, they're just so regal. They look at your with their intense eyes, you find yourself unable to tell any lie under a gaze so powerful. Excellent hunters, killing for food. I doubt you'll find any wolf, hunting for a pelt or for their teeth. And I have NEVER, never seen a wolf willing hand over their pups to danger. They protect their love ones, fight for their life and the life of their family their pack with all their heart.

I dunno, i guess these aren't great reasons to love wolves. But I've always have and always will. And I don't even know why i started liking them in the first place. I guess it's the fact that they are so wild, so fierce and their eyes are so intense. I had never seen a creature quite like it.

-As Always
-The Fearful Walker

Quote from my Wolf Calendar for the month of May:

And the chorus heard was that of beasts.
Over the hushed calm of winter echoed the wolf song.
-Wilbur

Posted at 05:15 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Sunday, May 30, 2004

Mutterings

Lover:: Hater
Ridiculous:: Stupid
Oscar:: Winner
Tennis:: Racket
Account Balance:: Yay....
Hickey:: Nicky the Hickey!
License:: to kill
Breathmints:: minty breath :-D
TexMex:: Fresh Mex
Stepmother:: Julia Roberts

Posted at 12:38 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Saturday, May 29, 2004

The Pain of a Sunburn

Heheh... Well we went tubing today. Drove to Mississippi and floated on a river for 4 hours. It was a blast. In the beginning I got my sunglasses knocked off, but oh well my mom just laughed about it when i got home. So we floated and I got some gummi bears, but zey were special gummi bears... lol they were pretty good, but pretty slimy, cause to make them, you just buy gummi bears and soak them in vodka for like 3 hours and then drain it lol... The gummi worms were stronger... Bleh... But i did enjoy my powerade and vodka... heheh, Joanie (Saddo's older sister) had some of the left over vodka in a bottle so we poured a little in our powerades... Hehehe... Then! Everyone started stealing it! O.O "Hey, can I have a sip?" "Sure..." "Hey, what about me? Just a little" But i didn't really care lol... And i had to make the birthdaygirl one so she wouldn't drink all of mine! Oh, and they had fried chicken, it was nummy!

We all got soo burnt.... hahha... when we got home some people were just like standing in the shower with their suits on, under icey water... lol... Haahahahha... it was soo funny... Jayson got turned into a crisp hehehe i couldn't stop laughing at him. Sarah too, eesh her whole back was BRIGHT red. So we were all like having an "aloe party" lol and Joanie drove us home. That hurt pretty bad too... Turns, not fun. Got home and took 4 advil. Heh, still hurts though. Ohhh and i know people are just going to be like slapping my back tommorow. Ehhh, not going to feel good...

-As Always

-The Fearful Walker

Quote of the Day:

(Talking about mud dopper nests)

Jack: Have you ever hit one of those open!? You know what they have inside of them? Like spiders and stuff!

Me: Sorry... Haven't really found the time.

Posted at 07:28 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Thursday, May 27, 2004

Pondering...

Hmm... today wasn't very eventful as most of my days. Went swimming, my bro and his girlfriend came over and we were all swimming, then Eric left for work. And Meghan's mom called so she had to go. So I got online, and started talking to Saddo. Her mom lives up in Telluride, well 30 minutes outside of telluride... But she's gonna up up there over the summer and she leaves on the 25 of June... So we are gonna have a farewell party for her at my house! :-D... Heh yeah!

Then I checked my tag board and went to respond to one of the tags I got. BUt when i got to their site, (which is cool) someone had tagged something that kinda sparked my intrest... They said... 'I like your blog, it's better than most peoples shit who write about what a good day they've had.' Hmm... well isn't that what a journal is for? And if you don't like it... You don't have to read it! But the best part to me is... Every day is not a good day. But there are a lot of things you don't share over the internet, or that I don't share over the internet. Because....

1. The internet is a place where you can be everything you've always wanted to be, but never had the courage.
2. A place where you can get away from all the bullshit in your everyday live.

And THIRD... a place where you shouldn't have to be criticized for anything that you have. On the internet it doesn't matter who you are,because it's a fresh start. Someone who stutters doesn't stutter on the internet, someone who has some sort of physical abnormalty is just like everyone else, on the internet. And if you're gonna sit around and say what people want to write in THEIR blog is shit... And when i got to look at their blog all their talking about is THEIR day... I find that a bit hypocritical... SOrry and i don't mean to offend anyone, but... What can I say!?

-As Always

-The Fearful Walker

Quote of the day:

Meghan: I just want... EVERYONE to know.. that I feel like a princess! :-D

Posted at 07:00 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Summer

Well yesterday was my lasy day of school, and now it's SUMMER! Heh. Spent four house out in the pool yesterday... without sunblock, but i didn't get burnt really. Mostly tan, but a little pink on my shoulders, and the blonde in my hair is coming back, from lack of sun during winter. My mom wasn't feeling well today, hopefully this won't be happening a lot. She's been sick or something like that for so long, and these last few months she's been extremely healthy. But we'll see... Dad was on call today and Eric was out and about. I made mom some tea and did the laundry and dishes for my mom.

Dad's group is moving to another hospitol over the summer. Hopefully if he gets to sick of the drive we won't move there, and we'll just move out of state. Cause if you're gonna move, you don't move to Baton Rouge. I saw Dead Poet's Society today! Excellent film, I had never seen it before, but i have wanted to see it for the past year...

Saddo has a new idea for the tubing trip. "Alcholic homemade gummibears...." Hmm, yeah, i'm not feeling it, but whatever floats their boats. I dunno every day with a lot of the c*** that is happening with this... Is making this trip less and less appealing... Guess we'll have to wait and see. We need rain here badly... All the plants are dying, that we aren't watering by hose. But i'm hoping it will stay off until after the trip... Or just enough for the plants, but not enough to raise the river to much.

-As Always
-The Fearful Walker

Quote of the Day:

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
-- Robert Frost

Posted at 11:41 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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Monday, May 24, 2004

Bad Day

Well... It didn't start as a bad day. It was fairly good. Woke up to the sound of my blaring radio alarm clock... Funny how it never seems to be that loud when you set it. But after 8 hours of silence, it tends to get louder. Heh... The lake looked really pretty this morning, the sun had to peek around the house to get a golden hue, and that only happens for a few minutes in the morning. Got to school and studied a little more, had to clean out my locker and ended up carrying like 2 big text books 4 notebooks and MLA, graph paper booklet and a Model UN binder, plus my book bad... -.-;

Then... My dad shows up to pick me up... Ok, i'm cool with that. But he's got to hassle me about school! That began to piss me off... So i get home and then he hassles me about not studying cause i just sat down on the couch... Whatever... ok i can deal with that... I dunno what happened! I just went from and ok mood... to super pissed off B****. I Dunno, maybe it was one of my conversations with my friends. Just all the little things. Stress from exams? Anyway...

Yeah, so i've been writing this book since the beginning of the year... and it's only like 4 chapters long... I feel really pathetic as a writer... But hey, i'm not writing this for anyone but my own amusement. Yeah, two of the chapters are on my other site... http://storiesbywwf.blogdrive.com and as soon as i have time i'll type up the 3rd since it's completed aswell...

-As Always
-The Fearful Walker

Quote of the Day:

"Well, growing up sucks. Not all kisses are magic, and most boys don't live up to your expectations. But, there are times when even love, romance, relationships...it all fits together perfectly. and it's incredible, and it's those moments, no matter how depressingly few and far between that make growing up worth it"
Anonymous

Posted at 10:21 pm by NonDiutiusAmor
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